It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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