She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
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I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
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THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
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