I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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