Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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