we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
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I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
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He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
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