I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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