Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize