In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize