What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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