I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize