it was like fucking gandolphs beard
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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