We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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