2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize