chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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