Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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