Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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