OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
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Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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