I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
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What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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