What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
where does the pee come out of this thing
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
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