i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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