hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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