I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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