She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
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You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
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Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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