Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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