remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize