Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize