apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize