Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
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I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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