I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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