just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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