You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Two words: nipple clamps
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