I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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