I wanna passion pit in your ass
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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