We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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