If i come over, it means nothing
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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