ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I lost the right to judge tonight
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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