don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I want her autograph on my taint
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize