come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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