Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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