I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Do vagina's smell?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize