I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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