Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize