Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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