he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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