I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize