How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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