the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize