is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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