After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
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I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
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He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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