yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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